Should We Ask More Questions?

April 28, 2012 by 3 Comments

Philosophy © Erik Back 2012

In my last post [Frustration! - A Bloggers Block] I expressed my frustration and that made me think. I realised that my passion is communication but I also made another discovery:

Me being frustrated was much more interesting to read about!

That post was the most popular post for weeks. That makes you wonder, doesn’t it? For the past 24 hours I have been thinking what I had to say that was so interesting?

I think there are two main reasons that my post was interesting: It was authentic and I asked questions.

The questions I asked were out of frustration, but people can relate to these questions and that’s what makes them interesting.

Maybe I should be more like Carrie Bradshaw?

My girlfriend and I don’t have cable, we don’t watch much television, but we do like to watch an episode of some trivial TV series on DVD now and then.

The TV-series that my girlfriend watches at the moment is Sex and The City with four female New Yorkers gossip about their sex-lives.

Although that TV-series is superficial non-committal entertainment I learned something from watching a couple of episodes.

The main character of the series, Carrie Bradshaw, is a columnist and every episode is about one of her columns. The series was made about 15 years ago when blogging was not a common concept yet.

If the producers were to make Sex and The City today I think Carrie Bradshaw would be a famous blogger instead of a columnist at a newspaper.

I noticed that Carrie doesn’t pretend to be an expert on her topic and her niche is quite common. She observes people around her and chats with people. She is networking and questioning her observations.

Puzzled writing

Carrie wonders why people act as they do; she compares people and situations; she philosophises over life.

Then she writes it all down. She writes her questions, observations and what she is puzzled about.

She never gives an answer to her questions; there are never any conclusions. Carrie always ends her columns with an open question. That way she does not act as an expert although people regard her as an authority on her topic.

The Internet is full of truth

Most blogs give information about the truth and how we should do things to do it right. But maybe people don’t need the truth? Maybe they need to get the opportunity to philosophise over life and discover their own truth?

Should I ask more questions and try to describe what is going on in my puzzled mind? Would that help you to a better life?

Filed Under: Blogging Tagged With: , , , ,

How To Share Experiences

September 26, 2011 by 1 Comment

Blue sky 2 © by Fabio Marini

This post is about the last item in the MAKS model – Sharing. We have learned how to map our situation, how to take action and how to reflect on the outcome of our actions to gain knowledge. If we really want to move and get to wherever we are going then share the experiences and the knowledge.

By sharing our knowledge we learn much more about our situation. Sharing our experiences and results forces us to put words on the outcome and our feelings. The feedback we get in return is invaluable. Sometimes we only need someone to listen because sharing knowledge or problems sometimes makes us see the situation in a new perspective and suddenly we know the answer to our problems.

If you think you understand something, then try to explain it to someone else. Teach someone how to do what you think you know so well. You will realise there are a huge amount of things you do not know and you have to learn all this to truly understand what you are doing. When you understand then it will be much easier to communicate what you know.

When we share our knowledge it is important to focus on the positive stories without ignoring the mistakes and failures. We have to tell about our project in and enthusiastic way or we will only harvest pity and laughter. If we keep a positive and optimistic focus, then people will provide us with new knowledge and possible solutions.

Filed Under: Meaning of life, Success Tagged With: , , , , ,

How Long Does It Take To Build A Business?

September 5, 2011 by Leave a Comment

Building your own business and creating an income that is decent enough to live from is hard and takes a lot of work and most of all it takes persistence and patience.

A business takes 3-5 years to build and the first year is, by far, the hardest. The first year you should not expect any income at all so be prepared to finance your business and living concurrently with other activities. The first year you need to set daily goals and do them even if it seems pointless. Work intensively on communicating your accomplishments in your network. Know that your network is the most important tool you have.

Your daily goals help you to keep motivation and that is very important because you will experience times where you just feel like giving up. But do not give up! Listen to the feedback from your network and be conscious of the messages you send out. Focus on your success because that will create positive feedback. Your close network like family and friends will be concerned about you and you will meet some resistance, but it is just because they worry and you have to be very positive in the stories you communicate.

After the third year you will see that you have reached a break-even and income seems to level your expenses and after five years you have a good business that can make you a living. It takes time to build credibility and trust; your environment needs to see that you can make it for at least one year before it starts recommending you. Your network needs a business partner that it can rely on.

Filed Under: Success Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

How To Choose Your Reality

August 25, 2011 by 3 Comments

To find the truth we choose to base it on the stories we find most trustworthy. We automatically trust stories that are told by our close friends, because we do not see any reason for them to lie to us. But we tend to ignore that they could be misinformed and tell stories that are at variance with reality; or maybe they just reproduce reality from their own point of view. We also trust stories that the majority are convinced represent reality; e.g. the medias.

It is worth keeping this in back of our mind when we communicate messages to our surroundings. If you tell something to someone you do not know, it is most likely that this person will seek verification from someone he knows better. That is why you have to look and act trustworthy if you want people to adapt your worldview. E.g. you are at a job interview; if what you say and how you dress is inconsistent, then you will not get the job because you do not appear trustworthy.

Another example: Whom do you vote for at elections and how do you justify your choice of candidate? Most people base their choice on the stories told in the medias and a lot of people just choose their candidate because he dresses nice and seem sympathetic.

To be welcome in other people’s worlds you need to reflect a worldview that they can identify with.

Read more about choosing

Filed Under: Worldview Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Is James Bond Real?

August 24, 2011 by Leave a Comment

The stories we tell and the conversations we have all contributes to our common perception of reality. By communicating we synchronise our worldviews and if we do not like the world we see, then we can try to change it by participating in that world. You can change people’s perception of reality by contributing with your stories and by exploring other people’s worldviews.

You have probably formed an opinion about certain actors or presidents in the world, but when it comes down to it: What do you really know? You have only heard the stories told by the medias and you assume that these stories represent the truth. Thereby these stories form your reality and worldview. Would your worldview change if you met these people yourself?

Stories can be interpreted in different ways it all depends on the angle you choose to see. This way the same stories can give different perceptions of what the world looks like. We all know that James Bond is fiction but somehow he seems more real than a random name from the phonebook you have never heard of before. That is because you have heard more stories about James Bond than about John Doe.

Choose your stories and you have chosen your reality.

Tomorrow I will show you how to choose trustworthy stories.

Read my articles here.

Filed Under: Worldview Tagged With: , , , , ,